A legitimate reason to be really really pissed off.

My homeroom teacher, my counselor, my host mother. Talking last night with host mom after I posted that last post. The way she said it made me want to do something that I would undoubtedly regret later. She had talked with my counselor and teacher and the three of them have apparently been communicating. She said something like this to me "I know this is hard for. But its not just hard for you. It was a very hard decision for the three of us to not let you stay. But we decided that for the sake of your future, it would be best not to give you the extension" WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU TO DECIDE ABOUT MY FUTURE?!?! ITS MY FUCKING LIFE AND MY FUTURE. JAPAN WAS MY FUTURE ASSHOLES!!!!!!! YOU WANT ME TO HAVE A GOOD FUTURE YOUR FUCKING BACKSTABBERS, LET ME STAY!!!!
I want to spend the last little bit I have just playing, but they wont let me. They still want me to stay in the same situation I hate so much. They dont want me to go out and have fun my way, they want me to have fun in the place where I have been trying to have fun and failing for the past 8 months! And they can send me home anytime I want.

There is a word in Japan 裏切り uragiri, which is translated into english as 'betray', but it means more than that. The first character means 'back' the second(and third, a grammar thing) mean cut. back cut. Betrayed by the only people I had connection to with authority. And because of it, I lose what was the biggest part of life up until now.

Oh the thinks I am thinking right now.