The Unjoys of Youth.
I'm not sure which I like less. Being treated like a child, or paying adult prices at museums. This is of course ridiculous, and I would much rather have to pay the extra money to be treated like an adult, then pay very little, but be treated like a small child. Reading Donald Keene's essays( http://www.yomiuri.co.jp/dy/features/essay/ ) I realize another unjoy of youth. Being in this program, I simply don't have the freedom to be an adult. I long to travel, I long to study foreign languages, but I have this program hanging over me. I think of my older brother, who studied in France without an exchange program (though it might have caused him great problems getting into college, I don't especially care to go to college, I'd much rather travel.) He had the freedom to do what he wanted. My family is Japan is rather strict, and I don't have the guts to just sorta get up and leave. I would love to hang out late at night like the adult that I should be treated like, but my family gets, well, upset, if I come home late.
People always talk about the "joys of youth". What the hell are those?
Peter
posted by Peter @ 10:35 PM
7 comments
7 Comments:
With you being in a different culture things are going to be different. Instead of looking at it like they are treating you like a child, take it like they care about you to worry and be concerned that you are well and not hurt in the middle of the night. Talk to them and explain things to them, how you are used to things etc.. and then ask them why they do things the way that they do and where they are coming from. You will find some pretty common areas and it may help you out in the long run.. they may relax a bit more and let you out more and you may respect them a bit more too. They have the added responsibility of having you under their roof and for taking care of you, and trust me.. takeing care of someone elses kid( no matter the age) is an undaunting task. Be open with them and try talking things out.. not getting mad or upset.. just talking. Just some friendly advise.
I dont want to be treated like their children. Both of their children are very immature (I was for while being treating identical to their 13yr. old). Im not going to get hurt at night. I have tried to explain to them that I am used to things being different, and they simply refuse to give. They always say things like "well, now you are in Japan". When I ask people why the Japanese do things their way, or some specific cultural questions, they reply with a phrase which I have come to loath. If people keep using like they have been using it to me, I dont want to, but I will get violent. It is a cross between "shit happens", and "thems the brakes" I do try to talk, and I do talk, but their answers drive me nuts. As to the added responsibiilty, they took my under their roof. Of the two families that said they wanted me, I said to my counselor I would have rather been in the other one.
I will try talking to them when I get back, and will see what a 3 week absence has done.
thanks
Dude. I'm sorry you're being disappointed by cultural differences. Too bad they aren't Jewish Japanese, 'cuz you'd be past bar-mitzvah age. The chances of their changing is hmmmmm---very low. #1, their culture, #2, their culture, #3, ditto. I'm sure there are "liberal" Japanese parents, but it sounds like you didn't get them! Poop. But, thought I'd say "hello" & hope you weather this with grace. Kisses, Nan
Strikes me that you need to recognize that at your age you are far more flexible and capable of change than your host families. So take advantage of what is positive in them and think how fortunate you are to have so much new and positive in your experiences--
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